coyotegoth | (no subject)

I'm gearing up for the new job: brushing up on my CMS and AMA (editing style manuals); thumbing through the orientation packet I got in the mail; exercising, since I always think more clearly when I make an effort to stay in shape. I had one episode of something unnervingly close to a panic attack, but I was able to fight it off, with meditation and willpower: this job is a big change for me, with many new responsibilities, and it's only natural that I should experience a moment or two of anxiety about it, right? The point is, it's an adventure, with new challenges- and after fifteen years in the field, and several months' freelancing at this company, it's a challenge I'm quite ready for. I spent quite a bit of time meditating on this last night, gearing myself up for the adventure to come, reminding myself of all the ways that this is infinitely better than another few years' worth of freelancing and its erratic income, and concomitant strain on my nerves.

Better to focus on the things I'll be able to accomplish through this job: getting my teeth fixed; catching up on the last *cough* years' taxes; travel. Sending Mom some money, as she lives on a small disability income. A new digital camera (must look into digital IR photography.) Donations to charity. I've actually been drawing up a list, which has been fun, and mercifully distracting for the moments where my mind tries to go into panic mode. This will prove to be one of the best things that's ever happened to me, because I'm damned well going to *make* it be.