more shower meming

This has not been a good couple of weeks, as far as focus goes; accordingly, it's time for a distraction. People who've been on LJ a while may remember the shower meme (so called because it was invented in a shower), in which one is asked questions, and then volunteers to ask questions in turn. curmudgeon did so recently; today, I'm answering baldanders's questions. The rules are below, and my answers are behind the cut:

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."

2. I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions.

3. You may then update your journal- no fair simply updating here, in comments- with the answers to the questions.

4. If you do #3, please include this explanation, and an offer to interview anyone who requests questions, in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you ask them five questions.

( Questions and answers within. )

(no subject)

Self knowledge can be such a difficult, hurtful thing. I consider myself to be, fundamentally, a good person; I do what I can to help my friends (and even strangers) when they need it; while I have certainly hurt people on my way through life, I rarely do so out of malice or anger (although I have certainly had my angry, and even malicious, moments); I work at not being a burden to anyone in my life. I'm coming- slowly; painfully- to appreciate that my life is not what I would have wished it to be; that I don't have- have never had- any particular sense of what I want my life to be- that the lack of inspiration, of a guiding star, is crippling my progress through life. I've never had a clear, unyielding sense of what I do want out of life, beyond ekeing out a living of sorts as an editor, and writing the occasional story. I don't think it's depression per se; I simply feel as though I've needed travel, and adventure in my life, and I don't know how to find it, or grow from it. I'm thirty-seven; I've never been married; I have little or no interest in living the traditional married-with-kids life, as much satisfaction and joy as I see it giving friends of mine. I've never been a part of that world; my life lies somewhere else, and I don't know how to find it.